presence

darren rowse has a great post on his blog called Rhythmic Mission.

first a comment on the word 'mission': i don't like it at all, because it implies that for a believer life can be compartmentalised into 'mission' and 'non-mission'. the prevalence of this kind of duality in christian thought today (and historically) just sucks, in my (not so) humble opinion. life is just life. whatever you happen to be doing, its part of life. and for believers, everything we do is part of the witness to those who don't believe, not just the bits we categorise as 'mission'. darren actually seems to be saying this in his post when he talks about connecting the daily rhythms of one's life with the daily rhythms of others, but this point is watered down unhelpfully (i think) by using the 'm' word.

the thing which twigged for me, though, in darren's post is the idea of not just being proximate to the people we meet and interact with, but being present with them.

presence requires much more than mere proximity. it involves giving of ourselves, dropping our defenses and actually meeting the other person, looking them in the eye and acknowledging our shared humanity.

i'm not very good with presence. i'm a whole lot better at absence, staying within my protected shell, keeping myself emotionally removed, observing and analysing from a safe distance. i don't connect too often or too well.

i really want to learn how to be present, if nothing else because my wife and daughter desperately need it...